The Atkins Election

That was one high-cholesterol election! Particularly the part where analyst Susan Egg-strich called the election for Kerry ("Bush loses!") moments after the initial exit polling data concluded that Kerry had landslide-quality leads in Florida and Ohio. I'm sure that gave Bush supporters a heart-clutching moment early on in the evening, but as actual votes were tallied, it was Kerry's people suffering the acid reflux. And left Susan scraping a sunnyside up off her face. Which just goes to show that people willing to answer questions from exit pollsters do not come anywhere near a representative sample. I did my own exit polling yesterday when the 5-year-old came home from kindergarten. He informed me that he and his classmates got to vote, and that Bush had won, 19-2. On the way to the school this morning I was remembering all the happy political sign wavers that have been greeting us on street corners these past several weeks. (really months, if you count the primaries.) I was thinking, wouldn't it be nice if someone showed up this morning for a cheerful post election pep rally. Well one guy did! He was located in front of the store formerly known as Eckerd's. (I'm sure because he didn't fear getting run over by a mass of cars trying to get into or out of that store.) He was a supporter of Adam Putnam, a local Republican for Congress who was re-elected last night. He was, like, 12 years old when he was first elected in 2000. Now I believe he is pushing 30, but still one of the youngest members of Congress. He had a big "Thank you" sign, so I vote the Putnam gang as the politicians with the best local manners. My analysis: We went for the meat in this election. Didn't go for the dessert items of economy, health care, education, social programs. We seem to be worried about our viability as a country as long as Osama and his crazies are loose. I thought Kerry's strategy a bit odd. He posed himself as the anti-Iraq candidate. Which is fine. There's lots to oppose about the war. But he then proceeded to say he wouldn't have done much differently, and in fact had no particular plan to get us out of the situation. I think if he had said, "We're out of there by the Fourth of July, 2005!" he would've stood a chance. Howard Dean might have said that. But I wonder if even the Democrats wanted Kerry to win. They kept saying we have to beat Bush, not that they were enthusiastic about Kerry. Kerry didn't even have the Boston's World Series Champion pitcher voting for him. Curt Schilling stumped for Bush. I think the push for same sex marriage legislation in a number of states created a situation where a bunch of other states (including OHIO, the critical state) decided to put that issue on their ballots. This made it easy for churches to get out their members in big numbers to vote for Traditional Marriage. I also think the vote against Nick Clooney (George Clooney's dad) was a vote against Barbra Streisand. It was an anti-Hollywood vote. Next time Osama Bin Laden needs to send his tape earlier. Maybe during primary season so we can figure out what his message is. But that Vote for Kerry t-shirt he was wearing probably didn't help matters. I do have one regret. Four years of bizarre statements from Theresa Heinz-Kerry could've been a whole lot of fun. Pass the Hunt's!