Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Robertson vs Chavez: Smite-Down 2005

I meant to comment on this topic a couple months ago, when we first got the word that Smite Makes Right. You know things are careening out of control in world affairs when Pat Robertson issues a fatwa. Yes, we all heard that correctly. One of the USA's most famed Christian evangelists this summer declared a Death Edict in honor of Hugo Chavez. Why, Chavez is such a huge troublemaker that I didn't even know who he was prior to Robertson's proclamation. Quiz: Who is Hugo Chavez? 1) Peruvian author of Campesino Literature. 2) Modern day migrant labor leader. 3) One of the survivors of the Andean plane crash where the soccer players had to eat each other to stay alive. 4) Former member of Menudo. 5) Shortstop for the Washington Nationals. 6) President of the largest oil-producing nation in the Western Hemisphere. Answer: Follow the oil! Which leads us to Robertson's suggestion that "someone" assassinate Mr. Chavez, who is president of Venezuela. (Maybe Pat can dispatch whichever of the angelic spirits on his shoulders that he was listening to when this idea first came up.) There has been a lot of hue and cry over the fact that calling for anyone's untimely demise, particularly someone you've never met, does not approach the heights of Christian charity. But the fact remains that who lives and who dies is an area that DOES fall undr God's domain. The question becomes: is Pat Robertson now God's earthly webmaster? Is he the Worldly Justice Arm of God's heavenly legions? If he personally assassinates Chavez, or gets someone else to do so, can he honestly say, "I was just following orders?" Isn't that what .44 Caliber Killer David Berkowitz claimed back in the 1970s? Let's bring back Crossfire and have Pat debate the "Son of Sam" over who has more moral authority! Later Mr. Robertson said his words were taken out of context (hopefully by someone using rubber gloves or a 10-foot pole). He was simply misunderstood! Little did we know he was daydreaming aloud, channeling strictly personal Rambo-esque fantasies that have nothing to do with his stature as the head of the Christian Broadcasting Corp. Well shouldn't he have warned us before the interview that he was planning to get all charistmatic on us? That he would start speaking in tongues that everyone would find confusing? He went on to say that "taking him out" COULD mean a lot of things besides killing. It could mean kidnapping! (No commandment broken there. Thou Shalt Not Kidnap is in the Misdemeanor Section.) It could mean getting two tickets for a Broadway Show and reservations for a nice dinner! It was perhaps a suggestion that Condi Rice, Hillary Clinton or Tammy Faye Bakker-(Whatever Her New Name Is Now) make the social sacrifice for the good of our nation! Well I think Pat should take matters into his own hands. I'll tell you what I would pay to see -- "Punching" Pat and "Hurricane" Hugo in the ring together. It will be one of those epic battles like the kind that Captain Kirk had, mano a mano, against various aliens, complete with a cheesy Faux Dramatic musical background. (Kirk's opponents were all strangely human except they had reflective skin, weird-colored eyes, ugly outfits or a little extra facial cartilage.) Better yet! We'll get them together in a Predators vs the Christians scenario, where they have to work TOGETHER in order to defeat (choose two): a lion and an alligator, a tiger and a Florida python, a panther and an angry moose, a charging elephant and a rabid fox, or bigfoot and a mosquito carrying West Nile Virus. They would each be bare-chested and wearing loincloths, so the mosquito would have a definite advantage. Let's see if Pat could forget all about assassination attempts and work with his Christian brother Chavez to survive! I am thinking this would be hugely popular in a pay-per-view setting, and I'd be willing to personally publicize it. When Christian leaders start calling for targeted assassinations (or even general ones, frankly) then their stature as both Christians and leaders must be questioned. I'll give Robertson the benefit of the doubt that he's laboring on God's behalf. Certainly the CBC network and associated ministries do a lot of good, and the people who support them are generally well-meaning Christians. But when their leaders start sounding like Osama Bin Loudmouth, then it's time for Preacher Pat to revisit God's statements on where his Kingdom is located.

6 Comments:

Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

ninest123 09.30
ray ban sunglasses, burberry outlet online, longchamp, michael kors outlet, nike air max, michael kors outlet, gucci outlet, replica watches, louis vuitton outlet, chanel handbags, ugg boots, oakley sunglasses, nike free, michael kors outlet, tiffany jewelry, louboutin shoes, polo ralph lauren outlet, louis vuitton, louis vuitton outlet, jordan shoes, oakley sunglasses, kate spade outlet, burberry, tory burch outlet, uggs on sale, nike air max, tiffany and co, replica watches, louis vuitton, michael kors outlet, ugg boots, longchamp outlet, michael kors outlet, louboutin outlet, ugg boots, nike outlet, ray ban sunglasses, polo ralph lauren outlet, ugg boots, longchamp outlet, louis vuitton, christian louboutin outlet, prada outlet, louboutin, oakley sunglasses, cheap oakley sunglasses, michael kors, oakley sunglasses, prada handbags

9/30/2015 01:31:00 AM  
Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

lululemon, tn pas cher, hollister pas cher, michael kors, ray ban pas cher, coach outlet, true religion outlet, vans pas cher, ray ban uk, air jordan pas cher, sac longchamp, coach purses, michael kors, nike air max, kate spade handbags, louboutin pas cher, lacoste pas cher, true religion jeans, oakley pas cher, air force, ralph lauren uk, air max, nike free, mulberry, true religion jeans, michael kors, new balance pas cher, north face, michael kors, sac guess, burberry, coach outlet, vanessa bruno, hollister, longchamp pas cher, nike roshe, nike air max, nike roshe run, converse pas cher, north face, abercrombie and fitch, hogan, hermes, true religion jeans, timberland, nike blazer, nike free run uk, nike air max, ralph lauren pas cher, coach factory outlet, ray ban sunglasses

9/30/2015 01:33:00 AM  
Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

abercrombie and fitch, reebok shoes, p90x workout, nike air max, instyler, new balance, nfl jerseys, longchamp, asics running shoes, mcm handbags, vans shoes, insanity workout, valentino shoes, north face outlet, nike trainers, nike air max, hollister, converse outlet, nike roshe, ghd, hollister, vans, chi flat iron, soccer shoes, mont blanc, giuseppe zanotti, north face outlet, ray ban, babyliss, ralph lauren, baseball bats, celine handbags, mac cosmetics, bottega veneta, nike huarache, ferragamo shoes, herve leger, oakley, louboutin, soccer jerseys, hollister, beats by dre, birkin bag, jimmy choo shoes, gucci, converse, lululemon, timberland boots, wedding dresses, iphone 6 cases, ugg,uggs,uggs canada

9/30/2015 01:35:00 AM  
Blogger ninest123 Ninest said...

bottes ugg, canada goose, hollister, juicy couture outlet, pandora jewelry, pandora jewelry, canada goose, moncler, supra shoes, pandora charms, swarovski crystal, louis vuitton, toms shoes, lancel, replica watches, swarovski, sac louis vuitton pas cher, juicy couture outlet, moncler, michael kors handbags, ugg pas cher, moncler outlet, moncler, canada goose outlet, moncler, canada goose, moncler, doke gabbana outlet, barbour, links of london, michael kors outlet, ugg,ugg australia,ugg italia, doudoune canada goose, canada goose outlet, louis vuitton, wedding dresses, pandora charms, canada goose, louis vuitton, karen millen, ugg boots uk, michael kors outlet online, marc jacobs, barbour jackets, moncler, moncler, coach outlet, canada goose uk, montre pas cher, thomas sabo, louis vuitton
ninest123 09.30

9/30/2015 01:37:00 AM  
Blogger Minko Chen said...

air jordan 13
longchamp handbags outlet
michael kors outlet
christian louboutin outlet
cyber monday 2015
cheap ugg boots
moncler outlet store
michael kors outlet online
michael kors outlet
calvin klein outlet
coach outlet online
oakley canada
fitflop sale
golden state warriors
chanel handbags outlet
cheap ray ban sunglasses
prada outlet online
michael kors handbags wholesale
tommy hilfiger
1125minko

11/25/2015 04:56:00 AM  
Blogger raybanoutlet001 said...

oakley sunglasses
ugg outlet
coach bags
louis vuitton sacs
pandora outlet
new york knicks jersey
skechers shoes
ugg boots
michael kors uk
hugo boss sale

7/13/2017 08:53:00 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home